Friday, April 26, 2013

The Mysterious Life & Fabulous Wake of Fallon McPhael, Greatest Writer in the History of Chicago



Who, you ask, was Fallon McPhael?  What murky details have emerged about his scandal-riddern life in literature?  Is it true what they say about his fight with Norman Mailer, or his numerous affairs?  What of his alleged public indecency on the site of Chicago's famous Picasso sculpture?

Details about the life of mythical (that is to say, fictitious) writer whose wake will take place at The Charnel House in Chicago on May 4th at 7:00 pm are hard to come by, and, indeed, unverifiable by any respectable standard.  Nevertheless, researchers have made available the index to Raskolnikov P. Firefly's unpublished and unauthorized biography of McPhael.  Reading between the lines, one begins to sense the shape of the life of the author of many of the most important nonexistent literary works of our time.  Here, for your delectation, is the document in its present, incomplete state.  Any further information regarding McPhael that you may be privy to would be much appreciated by McPhael's executors, whom I represent.

Index to the Unauthorized Biography of Fallon McPhael

Allergies
            To Australians (claimed)      366
            Peanut                                                110, 114, 298, 301, 333
            M.S.G.                                      298, 377-8

Anania, Michael                                 191

Ammons, A.R.                                     115, 118, 120-122, 403
            Negative review of                121

Barbarella, cameo in                          191

Bernstein, Charles                             406-11
            Physical altercation with      407

Berrigan, Ted                                     110-112

Bohemianism                                     10

Boxing                                                            9-12, 33-34, 177, 407

Breton, Andre                                    34-39, 46, 60-64
            And founding of Villanesque Quarterly
                                                            40

Canadian citizenship (rumored)     101, 130-6, 400

Chicago Sun-Times                             121, 180, 200, 299-301, 333

Coast Guard                                       13-18, 22, 66, 291, 400

Creeley, Robert                                  89, 98, 103-106

Curling                                               101, 130-6, 400

Democratic National Convention, 1968
                                                            41-45

Dick Cavett Show                              220-221

Dune buggies                                                44, 47, 55, 59-60, 88, 101-2, 187-188
           Lack of skill in driving                     88, 101

Ethnopoetics                                      250-255, 278, 310-312
            Tragic misunderstanding regarding           310-311

Farrell, James T.                                 220-221

Gems Spa                                           see Berrigan, Ted

Ghosts, belief in                                 11, 29, 88, 101, 104, 362
            Of Frank O’Hara                    88, 101, 362
            Of Rasputin                            31
            Of Yeats                                  360-363

Ginsberg, Allen                                  139, 407-8

Greektown (neighborhood) 151, 154-159

Green Integer (publisher)               166, 213
            Lawsuit against                     170-193 passim, 281, 316, 429

Green Mill Tavern                             59-61, 173, 230

Harper & Row (publisher)               66, 131
             Lawsuit against                              131

Hemingway, Ernest                           34, 37, 348-50

Hospitalizations                                 202-203, 221, 407-8

Fonda, Jane                                        190-194, 233, 237, 252, 408

Iowa Writers Workshop                   80-84, 89, 104, 221, 230, 232-5, 301-2
            Lawsuit against                      233-5

Kenyon Review, conspiracy against  112-113, 410

Lake Forest Literary Festival            398-9
          Lawsuit against                           398

Laroux, Leslie                                     101

Levertov, Denise                                166

Loyola University (Chicago)             45-59, 60, 322

Lycanthropy                                      103, 355, 357

MacArthur Genius Grant                  3, 6, 199-201
            Refusal of                               200-1

McSweeney, Joyelle
            Alleged paternity of             334
            Plagiarism from works by  367

Mailer, Norman                                 177, 219-220

Mexico                                                60-63, 99-100, 366
            Piñata incident                      103                
            Prison in                                 104

Motorcycles                                        60-3, 187-188, 202-203

New Directions (publisher)             235-237, 440
            Lawsuit against                     239

Nickname                                           11, 44, 67-69, 145, 406-407
            Alleged origin of                    68
            Altercation regarding           407

O’Brien, Edna                                    47, 88
            Drink thrown at                    47
            Revenge sought by                88

O’Hara, Frank                                                44, 47, 88, 101

Papacy, opinions on                          103, 355, 357-359

Pentagon, levitation of                      139

Paris                                                   60-72, 167, 406-408

Perloff, Marjorie                                407

Phobias                                              44, 104 190, 199, 235, 277-80, 345, 347, 399

Picasso, Pablo                                                66, 131, 156, 209

Poetry Magazine                              68, 120-3, 390
            Editorship (refusal of) (claimed) 122
            Lawsuit against                   123

 
Postmodernism, flirtation with        340-1
            Regrets                                   366-7, 370

Psilocybin                                           99-100, 156, 209

Public sculpture                                66, 131, 156, 209

Public nudity (charged)                   66, 131

Public urination (charged)              66, 131, 156, 209, 235-237

Ragdale Artist’s Colony                     98-101, 234-5
            Fire at                                     99-100

Rosset, Barney                                   200-240 passim
            And I am Curious, Yellow      213-217

Snyder, Gary                                      30, 33, 39, 99-100

Stephens, M.G.                                   17-23

Suitcases (collection)                        10, 30-3, 100, 223-9, 300, 348-50

Star Wars                                           77, 79, 213-230 passim, 409

Steinbeck, John                                  21-24, 33, 50, 55, 61, 420

Steinbrenner, George                       371-372

Suppressed works                            415-417

Terkel, Studs                                      56, 97-100
            Admiration of                                    97
            Actively disliked by               98

“Tupelo Honey” (song)                    145, 361-366, 422, 424, 426

University of Chicago Press             1, 411
            Lawsuit against                     81-89, 409

University of Notre Dame                290-291, 365, 370
            First Sophomore literary festival
                                                            290

Van Morrison collaboration             422, 424, 426

Vendler, Helen                                   232-235, 300, 303, 306
            Alleged affair with                300
            Negatively reviewed by        303, 306, 309, 312, 340, 345, 347, 390

Villanesque Quarterly, editorship      40-55, 307, 400;
            Founding                                40
            in France                                60-72
            Rejection of                            400

Vitkauskas, Lina Ramona
            Alleged paternity of              323

Wayne State University                    7, 277

Whistles, tin                                       88, 104, 145, 407-8, 422, 44, 426

Yaddo residency                               300, 303

Yeats, W.B.                                          90-94, 100, 145-50, 170, 201, 234, 260-5

Zyzzyva (journal)
            Lawsuit against                     399



Selected Works of Fallon McPhael

Criticism
            Come Here and Say That: Essays and Reviews

Poetry
            The Wheel and the Barrow
            South Shore Lines
            Three Words and Nine Sketches of Lemons
            L=A=R=R=Y
            The Droids You’re Looking For
            Gorilla Warfare
            My Only Regret

Journalism/Memoir
            In the Ring with Mailer

Novels
            The Last Bar in Bridgeport
            The Existing Disorder


**

We do hope you'll join the mourners, the writers, and the burlesque dancers at the Wake of Fallon McPhael — details below:



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